I really want to use this more often. To that end I’ve made some changes. First, new lay out and one that is mobile-friendly. Second, no comments. Because after libertarians, misogynists, and racists (but I repeat myself) discovered my post about Kingsman, I decided that I really don’t feel like moderating a comment section at all.
So now I need to decide what to write about.
I grew up as a very socially awkward boy in a conservative religious family and a game of Dungeons & Dragons when I was 11 years old changed my life forever. That game at a friend’s house one day after school set in motion new ways of seeing and interacting with the world that changed my life and made me a much better person than I would have ever been without it. Continue reading How D&D Made Me a Better Person
As I said before, I’m not going to be reading any white dudes in the next year. I’m a tabletop roleplayer, though, which means I need to look for diversity in that as well as regular books. I asked on Twitter and Facebook for people to give me their favorite tabletop roleplaying games that are created by people who aren’t white dudes. Here’s what I got back, with authors’ names and handy links to the games. (Note that titles starting with a * were recommended at least twice.)
1001 Nights by Meguey Baker
Blowback by Elizabeth Sampat
Castle Falkenstein by Mike Pondsmith
Cogs, Cakes & Swordsticks by Lynne Hardy
Community Radio by Quinn Murphy
*Dead Scare by Elsa S. Henry
Do: Pilgrims of the Flying Temple by Daniel Solis
Ehdrigohr by Allen Turner
*Five Fires by Quinn Murphy
Mindjammer by Sarah Newton
*Monsterhearts by Avery Alder Mcdaldno
Nobilis by R. Sean Borgstrom
Project Ninja Panda Taco by Jennisodes
Psi*Run by Meguey Baker
Steal Away Jordan by Julia Bond Ellingboe
Witch by Elizabeth Chaipraditkul (Kickstarter open until 03/31/2015)
World Tree by Bard Bloom & Victoria Borah Bloom
For a couple of years now I’ve been working to diversify my reading so as to correct how male and white it has been, pretty much ever since I started reading. My friend Heina, who is full of good ideas, recently wrote about how they have been making similar compensations in their reading habits. They also provided an awesome list of recommendations for people interested in doing the same sort of thing. Continue reading I’m not going to be reading any white dudes for the next year. At least.
[EDIT 02-27-2015: There’s been a change, I am no longer on the “When your traveler is my colonizer” panel on Friday. I suggested the panel waaaaay back in 2014 and offered to be a panelist on the condition that I not be included at the expense of people who aren’t 100% descended from colonizers. After the initial schedule came out someone else (who is one of my favorite panelists and literary critics) who isn’t as lily-white as I am became available and I have been enthusiastically dropped from the line-up. That said, even though I won’t be on the panel, I plan to be in the audience and You should be too.]
FOGcon 5 is March 6-8, 2015, which means it’s just about a month from now. It’s hands-down my favorite con. Why? Because it’s full of thoughtful, progressive people who like discussing stories about dragons and lasers through a feminist, intersectional lens. It’s just wonderful and I feel so lucky that it happens every year right in my back yard.
This time around I am on two panels, and they’re hella intersectional: Continue reading FOGcon 5 is coming and here is my panel schedule.
So it’s been officially announced that the upcoming remake for “Ghostbusters” will have an all female cast and dudes are freaking out. All dudes who are freaking out are claiming that their freak outs have nothing to do with sexism and are all measured and reasonable reasons to freak out. But we all know how excitable and over-emotional white male nerds are. Their freak outs are all for ridiculous and ignorant reasons and they’re all tinged with some misogyny. I’m going to go through some reasons given for these freakouts and explain why they are absurd. Continue reading Your reasons for objecting to the “Ghostbusters” remake are absurd and are probably sexist.
[EDIT – 02/25/2015: As of a couple days ago I’ve decided to stop approving comments in moderation that are just variations on telling me I’m a terrible reviewer (this isn’t a review anyway, it’s a recap and warning), that I don’t understand jokes (because we all know misogyny and white supremacy are hilarious), or that I should stick to “chick flicks” and would be justifiably murdered if this movie were true. I don’t have time and don’t feel like providing a place for “edgy” white boys to tell the world how little they care about other people. You have the rest of the internet for that.]
Last night I saw a free preview of Kingsman: The Secret Service and I was disgusted and angered by what I saw. It’s a foul movie full of terrible politics and I’m sure it will be very popular with the worst parts of Reddit, 4chan, and Gamergate. The movie opens with three white men in paramilitary gear torturing an Arabic man and it ends with a woman being a literal sexual reward for the protagonist.
The movie is about a secret non-governmental conspiracy of rich white Englishmen who know what’s best for the world and use violence to “save” everyone from democratically elected politicians. The villain is a black man and his main ally is a north African woman with disabilities. Now, he is fantastically wealthy due to his tech company and she is shown using sharpened metal running blades to kill lots of people, but there are literally no non-white people who are shown on the side of the “good guys.”
Continue reading Kingsman: The Secret Service is a terrible movie for terrible people.
In the spring I dipped my toe back into academia by taking a class. It went pretty well, in that I got the third-highest grade in the class. This week I’m continuing with a full-time course load. That plus working full time has me ready to freak out. If you’re a friend who wants to see me, please be understanding and willing to schedule one or more weeks in advance.
Anyway, I thought it might be entertaining to show you which classes I’m taking and what books I’ll be reading and working from. (Images are clickable, links go to Amazon.)
Continue reading School Days
I was talking to someone recently and the topic of expectations for how the world treats us came up. What was really interesting for me to realize is that the idea of voicing expectations for decent treatment from friends and lovers frankly terrified me. I submitted a post to Silver Ribbon Stories about my life-long battles with depression. Sometimes I get glimpses of what that, and life experience, have done to make me who I am. And not in a cool way.
I get really uncomfortable at genuine compliments about who I am or about my appearance. I’ve managed to get fairly comfortable with being complimented on what I do, but not for who I am. When someone says I look nice or that they like being around me it freaks me out. It does not compute. They’re obviously confused or I have somehow managed to trick them, right?
I’m not the guy people like for who I am or who they want to sleep with because they are attracted to me. My self image, way deep down is as the guy people keep around because I’m useful. I know people. I’m funny, I go out of my way to be a good friend. That is why people like me. Women who sleep with me do so because they’re bored, or because I’m funny. That’s how I see myself deep down.
And if that’s how I think the world is, how dare I have expectations that they will treat me with kindness or consideration? It’s ridiculous to think that someone like me should expect to be sought out, right? So the idea of expecting or hoping, let alone demanding to be treated well is terrifying and something I can’t get myself to do yet.
Now you know why I’m single, guys.
As a single nerdy dude I have an online dating profile. Specifically I have one on OKCupid. Today I got a message that amused me. If you thought only men tried using Pick Up Artist tactics like negging, you will be happy to know that being a jerk is truly an egalitarian choice. Here’s the message:
I LOVE WHISKEY just saying
star Trek is just is a kinda nerd show where dorks geek out on science right thats the appeal no real human connection with the characters but a connection to the ideas.
If you didn’t click the link to my profile above you might be helped by knowing that I made sure to mention my love of Star Trek and my fondness for whiskey-drinking women in my profile.
But, hey, negging is supposed to only be for “hot girls”…I feel so pretty!